Lunar Wanderings Episode 3: Honouring our inner nudges


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Hey! This is Silvia and you're listening to Lunar Wanderings - a space and place where you receive gentle nudges to help you dive deeper into your soul, encouraging you to explore your inner world and use the cosmic energies to let go of what needs to be released so that you can create space for new beginnings, new paths.

If this is your first time listening, welcome and thank you for tuning in. If you have been a regular listener, thank you for showing up and allowing me into your life. This is something I don't take lightly, hence the little pause. But that pause has brought so many insights, insights that were needed for me to truly embody what my intention with these lunar notes truly is.

I have felt for a while now that the pace of the Lunar Wanderings was off. Publishing one for each lunar phase was starting to feel like a chore, and there was some unlearning and reconditioning to be done there. Even though I enjoy tuning in and feeling into these energies, and I do so in my personal lunar journaling, especially because they have taught me so much about my own life, and my energies and inner cycles, and still do daily, and it has helped me align my outer world with my inner world in terms of my values and beliefs, and living according to them in every aspect of my life. Saying that I believe this is an ongoing process as our values change over time. As we change over time. As we fine-tune things.

In one of the earlier episodes, I talked about making changes until everything aligns with our values. And one of my values has been and is showing up intentionally, providing you with something that will hopefully help you on your path. But in reality, I wasn't truly embodying it. Recording weekly episodes started to feel like I was wearing myself thin. And that is not a place where I want to be in and it is not a place where I can provide value from.

To provide we need to take care of ourselves first. We can't pour from an empty cup and that is exactly what it felt like, especially with everything that has been shifting this year. I started to crave more balance, more being in between, more solitude and stillness, so that I could truly tune into my knowing and get to those deep insights that can provide empowerment not just for my own life but for you too to start releasing what no longer serves you, and step into the you that feels worthy of embodying her whole self. But first, I had to do that for myself. If you're familiar with Human Design, this is my 3rd line talking, the one who tries out things, falls flat on her face at times, and eventually sticks to what works. And my 5th line is all about sharing it in case it's useful to others too. And for all you Astrology lovers, that's my Virgo talking. I digress.

Again and again, I have found myself coming back to the themes of...

...Patience, surrender, flow - these words that in my mind fall under the theme of slowing down. I'm being called to slow down in a major way, not just momentarily but overall for life. Slowness aligns with my values and I tend to practice what I preach. When I talk about slowing down, what I mean by it is living a life that is truly yours. Letting go of the need to chase this idea of success that this modern world seems to glorify. To tune in, to start listening to your intuition, your inner nudges, and not just listen but to take aligned action accordingly. To start trusting that inner voice. Because ultimately, what will lead us to a life that is truly ours is that self-trust.

I suppose this massive shift around the need to slow down stems from leaving social media. You see, it has helped me slow down massively. It has helped get rid of a lot of noise, both internal and external. It has helped me tune into my knowing and relying on my inner nudges. It has helped me to truly start trusting what those nudges are telling me. To truly start shaping my views on the things that I'm passionate about. Being on social media had a massive influence on my views and I felt like I'd lost myself in all the different channels that I followed. I struggled to hear my voice amidst all the noise out there. These days, I am very selective about who I let in. Digital declutter has been a massive focus in the last month or so. And I finally feel like my inbox is becoming a sacred place, and my overall experience with the digital world has become more empowering in the sense that I choose where I show up and when I show up. My visibility is not dictated by an algorithm or my ego for that matter, rather, it is dictated by my inner knowing. With all that said I want to take a moment to talk about the idea of Knot So Wild and living a slow creative life, which has become intertwined.

What does Knot So Wild mean?

To begin with, it was a reference to my fibre art, to my macramé creations when I launched my Etsy in September 2020. But it also represented the embodiment of the feeling of being an introvert, someone who enjoys solitude and silence over crowds. Someone who loves her own company and may not be as comfortable or as loud around people. Although my partner in this life would disagree. But that's due to me being completely unguarded around him. And that is a journey I am fully embracing - bringing more of that whole self out into the world.

There was a time when I held onto these labels, the label of being an introvert, being socially awkward, socially anxious. But as I am delving deeper into Astrology and aligning my life to natural rhythms and cycles, I am finding myself to be a lot more compassionate towards myself, a lot more accepting and open. I no longer need these labels to define me. Rather, this whole journey of realigning has allowed me to embrace my whole self, my true self.

Knot So Wild is also a reference to creativity as much as it is to a quiet nature, to a deep love for meaningful interactions, and a love for the natural world.

I never quite imagined it would become a way of life, living a life on our terms which to me means embracing our true selves, embracing our whole selves.

I am rediscovering my love for symbolism. On that note, the symbolism of Knot So Wild is about untangling our knots, getting to know our true selves. As much as it is about untangling the knots, it is also about accepting them, and not shaming ourselves but rather embracing the raw bits of ourselves. Reconnecting to our wildness, our interconnectedness. Living life in cycles rather than in linear lines. Allowing life to unfold naturally. Stepping off the beaten path and getting curious about what brings us joy, what truly enriches our lives. Exploring our inner worlds and aligning with our true values.

I'm going to go off on a little tangent here but here's a few examples of a few changes I've made in the last few years with regards to living according to my values. I've been moving away from purchasing from companies that don't support sustainability. A couple of amazing experiences with regards to packaging that I've had recently. First one: Pip and Nut. Second one: Green People. Both orders came in packaging that is 100% recyclable, reusable or biodegradable. And that is openly encouraged and made known on the packaging and the messaging. That stuff makes me so freaking excited to support them because these are companies that help me live my values. I'd love to encourage you to connect with your values and see if you're really embodying them.

Coming back to Knot So Wild which, to me, is a slow creative life. It is a life lived with intention, embodying our values, being connected to our inner knowing and trusting her completely. The more I journey on this untrodden path, the more I am leaning into that self-trust, those inner nudges, and listening to them and living my life according to them.

I recently had a tarot reading done for me. Now, I don't use tarot or astrology or Human Design as a prediction tool and I don't see them as prediction techniques. Rather, they're tools that have helped me with self-reflection and learning to trust my judgement and my decision-making process. And that reading was exactly that. It allowed me to pause and reflect, to create space and permit myself to be, to rest, to just live - something we seem to have forgotten in this social media world.

These past 7 months have been some of the most intense months of my life. I've gone through a lot of shifts and changes, physically, mentally, spiritually. Heck, even the accident I was evolved in told me to slow the eff down. And to begin with, I did not listen. I found alternative ways to keep myself busy, productive. Part of it was to manage pain, to take my mind off reality. To escape. But the truth is - it tired me out - as vulnerable as it feels to admit it. I became tired of being on that merry-go-round of productivity, yet it is something in our society that is being perceived as a benchmark for a successful life. This no longer aligns with me, and deep down it hasn't for a long while. But it took me some time to truly embody that. Instead, I want to be part of the change-makers who, in my eyes, are successful but they are successful on their terms, living a life that is truly theirs. It is a magical thing to witness someone living their values, and showing up as their whole self.

I must give thanks to moon phases here seen as it has been the one tool that has truly allowed me to realign and to reconnect with what's essential in my life. Now, granted, the process has not been comfortable. It is uncomfortable to meet our naked selves, to look at our imperfect selves, to let our guard down and fully trust and accept the being that we are. Living a cyclical life permits us to find our own pace, to connect with what matters to us, rather than following all the pre-determined success markers that society dictates.

These past few lunar cycles have felt like the end of a bigger cycle and the beginning of the next big phase of my life. I've let go of social media. I am finally emerging out of the fog. I am reconnecting with my inner world, pouring solid foundations for my future. I am learning to live a life that is truly mine, living according to my values, and living in alignment with my vision. I've realised that this does not happen overnight. It is a journey. A journey that is so worth going on.

Settling into a slower way of life takes time, takes a lot of unlearning, a lot of untangling of knots. Letting go of the need to create out of fear or out of that scarcity mindset. Letting go of the need to be constantly visible. The need to show up and explain our every step of the way to others, explain our actions, our absence. As a friend so kindly recently reminded me, we don't need to explain ourselves to anyone. We just need to live our values, live our vision. And when we do feel called to share it, it will be received by those who are ready to hear it.

I don't know about you but I am done selling myself, spreading myself too thin. Constantly comparing myself to some sort of ideal that we all need to strive for. I am done jeopardising my sanity for the sake of being visible. I am done adding unnecessary noise into the world. I need it to be intentional. I want it to matter. Being visible is no longer about stroking my ego. Letting go of social media has taught me that, but it has been another uncomfortable process - to admit to oneself the true motives behind the sharing. To meet oneself with compassion and understanding and forgiveness.

As I'm unlearning everything about being constantly on to shedding the skin of the old me that needed that visibility, I'm realising that my voice matters. But it doesn't have to be heard all the time. It does not need constant recognition or acknowledgement. It does not need any recognition at all. That's not why I am showing up. More often than not, my voice needs to simmer, to spend time in stillness and contemplation so that it can emerge and be heard when the time is right.

During this period of invisibility, I've been paying attention to the nudges, to the signs that life, that cosmos is putting on my path.

All signs have recently been pointing in one direction. I've been slowly piecing them together and figuring out a way forward - a way that aligns with my vision and values. I value living according to them, not just in my public life, but more so in my private life. And honestly, that urge to want to share it has dissipated. That desire to share is now coming from a different place, a place that Ram Dass calls home in his famous quote of "We're all just walking each other home."

I mentioned earlier that I had a very insightful Tarot reading recently. The more time passes, the more it makes sense. You see, I've been afraid to fully embrace what my nudges have been telling me. I've been carefully tipping my toe in it but not committing fully. Until recently. Sometimes we just need that outside perspective to see the bigger picture. Sometimes we are too tangled in our knots.

Something has recently found me and my response to it was an instantaneous full-body yes, even though my mind was trying to talk me out of it for the same reasons I've talked myself out in the past. But this time I leant into my nudges and just went for it. Trusting in my inner knowing, despite not knowing the path ahead. How freaking empowering it is to trust oneself, to trust one's actions. I'd like to ask you these questions. And don't feel like you need to share the answer publicly. Rather, I invite you to take it to your journal and become naked with yourself. Allow yourself to be completely vulnerable with your self.

Do you trust your inner knowing?

Or do you ignore it?

Which one wins - your mind or your intuition?

August was all about surrendering. Allowing life to flow, allowing things to unfold naturally. Letting go of that resistance and that forceful energy. When we pay attention to nature, it is full of lessons to be learned. I remember so clearly a warm August evening when the local swifts were gathering together to start the migration south. Initially, I was filled with such sadness - sadness that marked the end of the summer, the end of the warm temperatures here in the northern hemisphere. But then I was reminded that this is part of the cycle, and that come next summer, the swifts will return.

Are you resisting and fighting against the natural flow, or are you ready to let go and see where it takes you?

One of those forceful energies for me has also been around finding a new home. But as I was browsing properties the other day, it dawned on me - I am simply trying to escape, I am trying to force something that is not ready to be. This is not the right time to move so why am I forcing it?

Because in a way I hadn't been feeling at home within myself. I'd been so hung up on my vision for my future that I was forgetting the present moment. Even my dreams were giving me all sorts of signals to be in the here and now more.

Hence why my word for the last couple of lunar cycles has been surrender.

Here are a few ways I've been embodying it.

Paying attention to quiet moments, to that morning sun peeking through the curtains during my morning journaling and reading session. The sound of rain as I settle in for the night. Garden birds chirping when they've come for their daily grub.

This brings me to nature. Noticing more of it, even if it is a quick visit to the garden during my lunch break, looking up at the clouds passing by, saying hello, taking a moment to ponder on their journey.

Self-reflection. Journaling on the emotional state and allowing myself to be vulnerable with my thoughts. Checking in with my inner child who has been throwing tantrums lately.

And breath. When I feel like drifting, I pause, take a deep breath and allow myself to come back to the present moment. Something so simple and natural as breath holds so much power. *Breathe*

Even pausing putting these episodes together was a surrendering. I surrendered to my inner nudges. And at first, I was filled with guilt. But then I was reminded of what my friend said - to just do what feels good and right, without the need to explain yourself to anyone. So I went with it.

Surrender to me is all about bringing myself to the here and now, noticing when I've drifted off, and bringing myself back. Leaning into the knowing that everything changes, that I'm here in this moment for a reason, but also knowing that this too will pass.

On that note, let's have a look at the upcoming energies of this lunar cycle. If this is your first time listening in, the Moon may be in a different sign than what you'd expected. And that is because I use the True Sidereal astrology to tune into these energies. True Sidereal looks at the stars and planets as they are in the sky right now. It takes into account the precession that has occurred in the last 2000 years. Tropical, on the other hand, which is the mainstream Western astrology, does not take the precession into account. And I want to be clear in saying that I don't think that one is superior or inferior to the other. Rather, they both serve a different purpose. And that is very much something I am actively exploring but not ready to share openly...not yet.

So, for now, these energy readings will be according to True Sidereal.

The New Moon on the 7 September is in the fiery sign of Leo.

The Aligned Intentions phase.

When I think of Leo, I think of self-expression. I think of embodying our truth, no matter how bold or courageous it may seem externally. Stepping into it and allowing the world to see the whole you, allowing the world to witness your whole you, the fire in you.

Leo: the courageous creator, the illuminated leader, the heart, the hearth, the fireplace, community, belonging. Being a part of the greater whole.

Leo is ruled by the Sun in astrology, and it lives in House 5: the house of creativity and playfulness.

How can you reconnect to your inner child? What lights the fire in your belly?

Hexagram 64 is made up of fire and water. If you're not familiar with hexagrams, it is an ancient Chinese modality called I'Ching.

Again, another example of the duality of life. Water is our unconsciousness.

What doubts and fears are holding you back from expressing your whole self in the world?

How can you surrender to the flow of life to follow your joy more?

How does it feel to follow that joy?

How can you honour that?

Moving on...

This First Quarter Moon in Ophiuchus

Ahhh, Ophiuchus, the 13th sign. I recently had the pleasure to learn about Ophiuchus from Kayla Cole. What resonated the most was this idea of Ophiuchus helping us embody our whole selves. We're taught to eliminate our faults and our shadows, to strive to improve and be better. And there is nothing wrong with being better, or having better self-awareness.

But what if it is not so much about getting rid of our flaws and trying to be perfect, but rather what if we accept all the parts of ourselves and integrate them into our wholeness?

And through that process of acceptance, we open that same door for others to meet their whole selves with more compassion and understanding and love.

I call this phase the Aligned Action phase. And in the past, it used to be all about getting myself out there into the world. Taking action out there or announcing my actions. But during the last lunar cycle, it dawned on me that sometimes that Aligned Action can be internal. It can be about mindfulness and presence. It can be about accepting oneself as we are in this very moment. It does not have to be this humongous action that we need to take towards our goals or announce to anyone at all. Sometimes the smallest step has the biggest reach. Sometimes all that is needed is stillness. And that in itself can also be Aligned Action. That is exactly what hexagram 26 teaches us.

Richard Rudd talks about the Siddhi state of the 26th Gene Key which sums up what I've just stated beautifully:

"To dance with the 26th Siddhi is to let go of all agendas. Such people are invisible in a way that most cannot understand. They are invisible because they do not care what others project on them. They do not seek to enlighten anyone; they do not really want to influence anyone at all. They truly have no agenda. They are simply here as loose cogs within the machinery of existence. They love to defy the laws that we humans cling to. They are the tricksters who love to twist and turn in the currents of existence, for no other reason than that they can."

How can you utilise your energies so that it serves you first?

What part of yourself needs to be met with compassion right now?

How can you honour it?

What Aligned Action can help you honour that energy?

This brings us to...

Full Moon in Pisces, the Aligned Reflection phase.

Pisces is the healer, the mystic, the poet. Mutable Water energy. Mutable signs in astrology are all about adaptation. They're flexible and exploratory. Combining it with the Water element of receptivity and intuition, we have a Full Moon that calls us to go inward, that calls us to pause and reflect, and if need to divert our direction. What's hiding in the deep waters of your soul? This is so beautifully supported by hexagram 63 that calls for renewal. The gift of Gene Key 63 is Inquiry. Again, we are invited to tune in, to explore our inner world.

What is this Full Moon shedding light on in your life?

What areas do you need to explore further?

What needs that healing energy?

What is your Inner Truth whispering?

And finally, the Last Quarter Moon in Gemini, the inquisitive one.

I refer to the Last Quarter phase as the Aligned Surrender phase. It is time to let things be, to let go, to release. Just like air simply is, it has no boundaries, we are called to just be, allowing rest stillness to fall over us. Time to look back on the phase, and the previous cycles and see what is coming to fruition. Hexagram 52 is called Keeping Still. "The heart opens through stillness." It is time to see what the heart reveals. In order to do that, we need stillness, solitude. Even if it's just 5 minutes of being with your own self. Allow yourself to sit and listen to your inner whispers.

What is your heart whispering?

What are you finally ready to release?

How can you open up space for the next New Moon, the next lunar cycle?

And so the cycles continue. The spiral keeps spiralling.

All in all, I feel like this new lunar cycle is calling us to change our pace, especially if we're on the northern hemisphere. The seasons are shifting. The temperature is changing. Nature is slowing down and preparing for hibernation. I feel like we are called to do the same - to buckle down for the darker months ahead. That's the beauty of following these natural patterns - we no longer resist what the energies around us and within us are indicating. Rather, we start to live our lives in harmony with these energies that we as humans are part of.

What does changing that pace look like for you?

And finally, something that has become somewhat of a ritual, I want to leave you with some words that I've recently connected with, words from Wendy Matthews, a song that a little while ago was on repeat on my Spotify. Here goes:

"I hope that you listen To the voices inside They know what you're feeling Don't push them away We all need deliverance From our disarray Are you happy Really happy Your wishes were granted But are you happy We need more than one thing But one thing is love I've been to the mountain Couldn't see the top I know you've been looking Waiting so long To be happy Really happy 3 wishes were granted But are you happy?"

Til next time, dear lunar wanderer.

Take care!