We live in a society that celebrates success. Sayings such as "Quitting is not an option" or "Good things happen to those who hustle" only solidify our need to succeed, at whatever cost.
But what if we didn't have to succeed at every single endeavour?
What if some are just pit stops here to teach us a lesson while we're on our way to our soul purpose?
I spent 3 years trying to build an online wellness business. A little while ago I called it quits. And here’s the thing - I do not regret one single second of that pursuit. Here's why.
It brought so many wonderful people into my life. I was able to empower so many women on their journey to self-love and acceptance. I had some amazing encounters and experiences along the way. I was, and still am part of a community of like-minded women who are so keen and ready to cheer me up on my down days and cheer me on on my good days.
But it also taught me a lot about myself. It brought so much growth and exploration into my life. If it wasn't for these experiences, I probably wouldn't be the person I am today. And even though the business side did not work out as I had originally envisioned, it acted as a stopover for something much more special, somewhere I do envision myself going.
When I decided to take that leap into starting my own wellness business, I truly thought that this was what I wanted. I had fallen in love with the idea of what this could lead me to. And for a long time, I forced myself to believe all the stuff I'd put on my vision board. I'd made myself want the things on it. But every so often a doubtful thought would creep into my mind. And I'd just brush it under the rug, too scared to actually picture what it would feel like to give it all up.
Do you know what I was afraid of?
I was afraid of what people would think of me if I quit. I was scared to admit that this is actually not what I had envisioned my life to be like. I could not see the bigger picture. I could no longer see myself pursuing this "dream" I had. Because it was never my dream to begin with. But I was just too darn scared to admit it, to myself and to others. Letting it go in my head equated to failure and doing it publicly just felt so damn humiliating. But in reality, it opened the door to something that feels so much more natural, so much more authentic, so much more me, so much more valuable and way more meaningful and joyous than the pursuit of that wellness business ever did.
Letting go of the last 3 years was the most liberating act I’ve ever done. I knew deep down, once I’d admitted it to myself, that this was not the way I was supposed to leave this world a better place. That the Universe had other plans for me and all I had to do was listen, truly listen.
I honestly thought I’d found my purpose. I made myself believe that I was called to help other women who’d always hated their bodies, who’d always had low self-esteem, lack of self-love, struggled with emotional binge eating because that is exactly how I had helped myself transform - from 60+ pounds overweight and unhealthy and full of self-loathing to full of energy and positivity and self-confidence I'd never felt before. I wanted every woman out there to find that place of self-love too. Or so I thought.
Instead, that nagging voice that there’s something else inside of me that needs to be unleashed into the world kept following me around. I knew, in order to take on that journey, I had to turn my back on the business and community I’d spent 3 years building.
Slowly, I was drawn back to my creative being, my introverted self who loves pondering over human nature and the state of our society, who rebels against societal norms, who has made it her mission to find her own path, to live a life that’s intentional and filled with things that bring her the most joy, and to use her unique voice to empower others who feel stuck in the cogwheels of modern life to find their version of an authentic life.
So, if you’re sitting on something that you feel is no longer serving you or your values, do NOT be afraid to let it go. I know how hard it is to admit defeat to the people around you, and more so to yourself, goodness, MOSTLY to yourself, but trust me on this one - by letting go of what is no longer serving you opens up doors to something way more beautiful, way more magical than you could have ever imagined.
YES, you will most definitely feel lost and stuck and doubtful but when you truly take the time to dig deeper and reconnect with your True Self, when you learn to let go of your inherent need to control and just surrender to the here and now, and feel into those nudges your inner knowing is giving you, you will find your own path, no matter how tall the grass is or how gnarly the undergrowth seems.
Here’s are some questions that helped me tap into my inner knowing:
Do you find yourself mindlessly scrolling through social media and feeling utterly stuck?
Are you pushing towards something that just feels a bit off but you’re too afraid to let go because you’re worried about what others might think?
Do you find yourself looking for external validation in the form of social media likes and follows and pats on the back?
What would being brave to take that leap and truly learn to trust yourself feel and look like?
My dear wanderer, together we will take on the greatest journey of our lives - the journey to our True Selves, the selves that trust their inner knowing regardless of what the society tells us; the selves that no longer seek that external validation but instead know that they are worthy regardless of the follower count; the selves that are not afraid to let go of things that no longer serve them; the selves that know there’s something big and magical out there waiting for us. We just gotta listen to the whispers within.
Can you hear them?
Til next time, dear wanderer.
This was sent to my fellow wanderers in February 2021. To receive these monthly musings in your inbox, sign up below. Can't wait to journey with you!